This season

Just a few musings of this season...








In becoming the true self, one must continually re-evaluate; identify patterns - both positive and negative - true highs, true lows and move forward. Self-improvement can only come from learning from lessons of the past - again both the good and the bad. 


I have come to realise that in this season, my schedule is quite hectic - I have taken on quite a bit, with several goals to achieve, which take more work than I have ever had to put in, on a daily basis. Life is a constant push; like running a race, you must push on if you want to achieve goal X or goal Y or goals X, Y and Z! (the number of days I have felt like I was back in school running that cross-country race!)

I have also learnt that I need to stop focusing on the difficulties I face - "gosh I only slept for X hours last night" or "things are hectic" or what ever comments or experiences I share in a less than positive light. Thing is, life has no pre-determined course, as school does; and whilst the conditioning of school days is still very much apparent; I have to realise the course of life is self-determined. I cannot be speaking of things being tough, when in actuality; I have chosen this path; no one has chosen it for me. Whereas in school you needed to do X, Y and Z to get in to a good uni, or get good grades; in life the choices you make are bigger than that - they will literally change your life - and to emphasise it even more, you are in control. Do not fall prey to the challenges you have set up for yourself. They are your challenges.

It's funny, I came to realise this when I truly looked at the schedules of the lives of my close friends. They are getting on well, yet have very different schedules. 

So at the end of the day I need to take more control over what I want to achieve, yes it may be tough; but it's the path I have chosen; there may be some things that I will shed off in future; but for now I have chosen to pursue them. 

Now this message is something you here constantly - you are in control of your destiny; make a plan for your life etc. But sometimes it does take time before those messages truly resonate with you - believe you me; I can be quite stubborn so whilst I know a lot about what I should do; if it does not resonate with me on a personal level, then it is just that- knowledge.

***

"No matter where you are from, your dreams are valid" - Lupita Nyong'o

Here is another case of resonance on a personal level. Truth is, I am one of those people who can only really believe something can happen, when I see someone like me or with whom I associate my self with. To be honest I think that may be the case with most people. Anywho, the recent awards season that was abuzz with Lupita Nyong'o set ablaze (or at least a warm glow) the hearts of many who associate themselves with her- the dark skinned woman, the creative at heart growing up in a less than encouraging environment; the African, the Kenyan, the Nairobian, the Luo etc. The thing is, if you have a grown up in an environment where you have felt a tad ostracised from a certain community, nothing speaks more to you than seeing what you feel is a representation of your self, being globally applauded and appreciated for works of your passion - no matter where you are from, your dreams a valid.

Now it is very reason that I wanted to come back home after my undergrad degree in Bristol, UK. Stuff was happening back home that I wanted to be a part of - stuff that I resonated with, that represented me. I am so happy to see things develop and progress in the expression of self-love in my country and continent - and I can see things moving towards a sense of normalcy; a norm in the appreciation of our works and the continual self-improvement of our works. It is truly heart-warming and awakens a sense of can-do and validity in your life aspirations - no matter where you are from, your dreams are valid.

With an attitude like that, the knock-on effects are priceless.



***Kuzakai***

Update

So I've discovered more and more blogs and websites that continue to inspire me. Honestly, is it possible to get as much pleasure as I do through looking at such amazingly aesthetically pleasing creativity! Honestly, if I could make a living out of searching for creative stuff...I'd probably be living a very comfortable life...spent blog searching.


I've decided I need to put to paper, or action some of the ideas which float through my mind...make them real! Do my research at work (hehe) then execute during the weekends; work my other side of being a Research Executive :p


My side hustle, which would hopefully become my main hustle would be to tap in to the creative potential of this country...honestly there is so much to work with, you just need the right brain to bring it all together.


I'd love to learn how to sew...I sometimes drift-off thinking 'What if the British Curriculum incorporated Sewing as an optional A-level?? and Kiswahili as a compulsory subject?..yes would love to know how to speak that fluent Tanzanian Swahili!


Anywho...on to my creative empire. Some one I know told me I need to work with some one if I want to go anywhere with it...and I've been thinking..so true! I think when you think your own big dream, it's hard to imagine pairing up with some one who will share the exact same vision; but Rome wasn't built in a day and nor will my creativity empire..I need to stop looking at the obstacles and start looking and only focusing on the opportunities, unapologetically.It's a nice feeling,to stop what if-ing and saying that others are lucky they have time, or have this skill, or that environment to do this and that that I'd like to do. Everyone has their own path and I need to own mine; it's a nice feeling to learn and discover what mine is :)


I truly believe that all my childhood dreams are a validation to what I ultimately want to do in life; and sometimes refer to them to understand what it is I really love doing; not what the world tells me I should do. I love that feeling; I've got history with my dreams :)


Where does research fit in to all of this. Well honestly it's something that I fell into and while it's not my ultimate passion for life, it's something I find pretty interesting. I would really like to establish myself in market research; get my key learnings into how markets work and especially the Kenyan and African markets, because ultimately that is where my creativity empire will be thriving. By understanding the nature of these markets, I should be able to get an insight into how I can deliver my message to them. Although not directly related to my creativity empire, there is so much I can learn through this experience: project management being the number one, meeting deadlines, learning how to communicate effectively in life and on paper, learning how I work best, turning away from my procrastination way of working.


Nevertherless, I think I believe I understand why I've tended to work only when under pressure and it's not like most books and what not say...it really is because I deliver my best work when under pressure as I focus more and deliver better results. So I've been turning that need to putting my own pressure, setting a plan and giving myself deadlines within a cushy timeline and when I really don't have psych to do the work..when it starts to dwindle...I read my blogs! I browse my websites, stimulating my mind in the most amazing way get ideas, make my side plans and mini projects to execute on that side and when I'm done, I focus on the next paragraph or section of work I doing in the office. It's working well for me, I get the best of both worlds. Hehe and then my weird working patterns...yup I letting them be, be it weekend, morning, noon, night..when I have the psych to write that next paragraph I go and do so and when I feeling like I'm losing steam, I focus on something else I love doing. In the end I get everything I love, done. It's an amazing thing I've learnt!! Just letting myself function the way I want to and not the way I ought to and I believe my new job lets me do that comfortably and lets me work the way I want to.


This post has actually turned out longer than I expected, but anywho thought I'd finish off with two websites I love; one which has become my daily fix and another I discovered through it. The first is Afri-Love which basically incorporates what I would ultimately love to do in life...the afrinspirations are to die for!(hehe) honestly an amazing amazing site I thrive on. Then another site, which I only discovered yesterday Mutua Matheka. I love the exuberant quality of this blog and the clear creative focus plus it's just an expression of Kenyan creativity! Amazing. That's a blog I love for not being mediocre but actually showing us all how beautiful our country is and how talented and amazing our people are. It's confidence in a site; love it.


...now on to my next tamu activity :)

PROCRASTINATOR

Hehe, well yh that's what I've just realised...keep saying I'll do something and then put if off or forget. Must make a list after this...and not procrastinate!




Anywho the post is finally here...was having a mental debate on the way home today as to whether I should keep it just to creativity or include snap shot paragraphs of what's going on in la vida. Verdict...well not sure but will see how it goes. Oh and my excuse for procrastinating..my book!! Ah gosh it has just become so gripping ('Sundowners' by Lesley Lokko).






I love the last book I read by her: 'Bitter Chocolate'. What really draws me in with her writing is that she is able to combine all the elements of girlyness on a background of political international strife! Ah wow! Then the combination of fashion and driven women blazing the pages! Hallur! Hehe! Amazing...if you're not one for reading about history and politics..read one of these books...you'll be hooked on the historical references! Amazingness! :)






K, but back to the original inspiration for this blog...fashion, creativity and everything in between with the focus primarily in Kenya...although will probably throw in quite a bit about Bristol - my second home :(...nostalgia's been hitting hard over the past few weeks! But ah the quirkiness and creativity of this small city is amazing and stimulating and quite possibly bliss...walking down Woodland road, lined with Arts and Social Science Departments; I was instantly inspired! Needless to say post lectures, I spent my time window shopping found little treasures dotted on narrow off-streets, ventured into cute cozy boutiques and obviously not forgetting the typical high street shops. But it was the boutique niche shops and the arts student-trailed Woodland road that just got to me...sense of bliss!






Bringing it back home I've dedicated a day; Saturday. Saturdays have now become my dedicated days to bring such exploration back home, as it's my only true free day! And I'm discovering! So much to see...and I know there is so much more to digest!! Cannot wait to get my head around the hotspots and conquer creativity!!






...more to follow.... :)